Teenage years are tough, especially if you have a young daughter. This is the time when she experiences too many changes both bodily and emotionally. This is when she grapples with academic pressure. There is also peer pressure to look good and appear ‘with it’ and to belong. There will be times when she will feel that she isn’t attractive enough, her nose is too long, her hair too short and her hips too huge. This can cause great damage to her self-esteem and crush her. While you nourish her talent, shower her with love and point out that she’s a wonderful, lovable human being with a lot of blessings to be thankful for, you could help her with her appearance with the tricks only you know.

A growing girl can rely on her mother to help her develop into a strong woman with a good self-image. With growing consciousness about womanhood and femininity, your young daughter will feel the need to look good. As a mother you play a key role in helping her develop her sense of style and beauty. As she grows, hormonal imbalances will give rise to skin problems and other beauty hassles.

TALK TO HER ABOUT THE PHYSICAL CHANGES

By the time your daughter is 12, she will start noticing the changes in her

body. She would feel herself growing and be conscious of body hair. She may notice her arms and legs becoming bigger, breasts growing and the waist becoming slimmer. Instead of making her feel that she needs to hide herself, you need to make her feel proud of her growing femininity during this awkward phase.

With her breasts developing, ease her into wearing a bra. Today, there exist many brands that make bras specifically for growing girls. Help her choose the right bra from those ranges. Let her tryout various styles that will give her the right support and avoid sagging in future. Be sure that it sits comfortably on her when she is trying out the bras. The fit should be smooth and not too tight. Do not buy a bra that puckers or squeezes her breasts, leaving bulges of flesh poking out around the sides.

HELP HER WITH SKIN CARE

According to beauty and skin care experts and even dermatologists, by the time girls become 12-13 years old, it is important to inculcate a good skincare regime. Since girls enter puberty and menstruate by this age, their skin experiences many ups and downs. A good skin care regime at this age will make sure she has clear blemish-free skin as she grows into adulthood.

With the onslaught of hormonal changes, there is extra secretion of sebum in young skin, which makes it oilier. So girls with normal skin experience oiliness, dry skin can give rise to T-Zone and oily skin can experience eruptions and significant breakouts.

The first step to starting a skin care regime is with the cleanser. The right cleanser can balance the oil production in the skin and wash away dirt and grime, the key culprit behind the outbreak of acne. Research shows that more than an oily diet or stress, pollutants in the environment and dirt give rise to pimples as they clog the pores.

To fight regular oiliness, give your daughter a soap-free foaming cleanser. Make sure that this cleanser does not strip her skin of too much oil, which can actually trigger an increase in sebum production. If her skin feels sensitive, then an oil-control cleansing cream is a better option. If she has acne-prone skin, consider washes that contain salicylic acid to control oil production. Look for medicated face cleansers that have benzoyl peroxide or salicylic acid to treat pimples or glycolic acid to rid skin of dead skin cells. If your daughter suffers from excessively greasy skin, then give her an alcohol-free toner that will close and tighten her pores. And in no condition should she squeeze her pimples or zits that can lead to permanent scarring of the skin.

Post-toning, teach her to protect her skin with a gel-based sunscreen. This will protect her skin from pollutants as well as the sun’s harmful rays, which can exacerbate oil production

and, in turn, acne. Look for a sunscreen with at least SPF 15 in it. At night, ask her to use a light oil-free moisturiser to keep it soft and avoid dry flakes. A light moisturiser will do; she does not need separate creams for eyes. Stop her, if she wants to bleach her skin, since it can hurt existing pimples and cause damage to the young skin.

You can give her homemade masks once in 15 days to cleanse the skin from inside. A mask made of sandalwood and milk or yoghurt is gentle on young skin. Do not buy her cosmetic masks, as they are meant for more mature skin. Encourage her to drink a lot of water, as this washes out toxins from inside. Give her, her daily dose of fresh fruits and vegetables that supply the skin with nutrients and help the body develop well.

INTRODUCE HER TO MAKE-UP

With today’s increasing exposure to international fashion and beauty trends, girls are becoming conscious of make-up at a younger age than the earlier generation. In fact, many want to start using make-up earlier than you would like or approve. Since teenage years are when girls tend to revolt against restrictions, it is a good idea to let her have a few good quality make-up products. While you can be strict about the no-makeup rule with 12-14-year-olds, by the time they turn 15, you may find yourself giving in to their demands. Let them use a nude lip gloss and maybe beige eye shadow.

She can use these when going out with friends or to a party, but make sure she is clean-faced when boarding the school bus. Emphasise on the beauty of natural skin colour and complexion; make her feel good about her fresh looks. A bit of encouragement about her beauty will not only get her on your side but help in building her self-esteem as well. In fact, she will appreciate it if you initiate her into the world of make-up with the gift of a make-up product. Be her guide, when she goes shopping for make-up. For a 16-year-old, 3-4 make-up items are ideal to own. A pearly or creamy lipstick or a clear lip gloss, translucent powder, clear mascara, a two-in-one powder (that works as blush and eye shadow) is enough for her make-up bag. When it comes to colours, sheer colours are ideal for teenage girls. A red lipstick or the smoky-eyed look is a strict no-no.

They are for mature women; make her see that. According to make-up artist Bobbi Brown who recently wrote her book on teen beauty, dark make-up is a definite no-no. Young girls, especially the ones starting college, look best with sheer colours. Help your daughter choose a lipstick with pink or peach undertones. Pinkish nudes are ideal for young girls; while they play up the skin tone, they are subtle enough to look natural. The idea is to help her enhance her natural complexion rather than hide flaws. This is the time when due to hyperactive hormones and acne outbreaks, young girls may have blemishes that they may want to hide when going to college. Teach her to use a stick foundation and a light dust of powder to hide her blemishes. Your daughter may be using braces; they tend to dry the lips; so encourage her to use a tinted lip balm that will add soft colour to her lips while keeping them moisturised.

When they reach 16 or 17, many girls, will want to shape their eyebrows or be worried about body hair. While you can hold her back on eyebrows till she finishes school, encourage her to keep her underarms clean by waxing the area or using a good hair remover for sensitive skin. If you feel your daughter has excessive body hair, she can start with waxing her legs at around 16. Maybe you can relent before her farewell from high school and let her get her eyebrows done and arms and legs waxed.

TELL HER ABOUT INNER BEAUTY

During the teen years, skin breakouts, changes in complexion, blemishes, the changing body shape and menstruation can make your young girl go into a state of stress. You may find her trying to battle these changes or developing low self-esteem about her looks. She may feel ugly, awkward and unattractive. Combined with this is peer pressure, where other girls might stress her out with different versions of what is ideal for her age.

As a mother, your role in helping her develop a strong self-image becomes essential. You will need to spend some quality time and talk to her. Explain the changes that will make her a beautiful woman. How you treat her growing body will eventually develop her self-image. Make her feel loved and appreciated through this phase of change. Go with her every step to make her see herself in a positive light. Finally, stress that she is beautiful for what she is and not just how she looks. With this little help from you, your young daughter is bound to grow into a beautiful young woman.

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